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Bitter or better this year, it’s your choice

The older I get the more I realize everything in life is about the choices we make. What we choose determines our destination. As I celebrated my 51st birthday on Dec. 30 and now head into a new year, it makes me more aware of my choices I make every day. Either I can choose to stay bitter over past disappointments or I can become better and rise to succeed. I definitely believe rising to become a better person is the better choice.

The thing is I know we all have made bad choices from time to time in our lives. We are human. Sometimes these choices have even left a few scars. Sometimes people have hurt us and left scars. I wish I could say we get used to the pain of these scars but we don’t.

However, here’s where we can choose to become bitter or better.

I have to remember that my scars are a testament that I have loved deeply and lived sometimes recklessly, but I’ve lived regardless.

Scars also prove that I can be cut deeply and still heal, and I will continue to live and continue to love. Ironically, scar tissue is even stronger than the original flesh ever was. So scars are a testament to life.

When I think of life, I am also reminded of death. Again, I have to choose to not be bitter but reach to understand better. I wish I could say you get used to losing people in your life, but you don’t.

I’ve lost grandparents, my father, an unborn child, other family members and friends. Each time it rips a hole through your heart and at that moment you feel like a part of you has died with them.

The grief washes over you again and again, coming in waves. At first you feel like you’re drowning in sorrow. There’s nothing but wreckage around you and you’re grasping at anything to just stay afloat. Wave after wave hits you and you can’t even catch your breath. You truly feel like you will drown in sorrow. Then slowly the waves get smaller and somehow you survive. You are still alive, of course with more scars now, but alive nevertheless. So you find comfort in realizing your life is better because they were a part of it.

Yes, every lesson in life will either make us bitter or better. I just want to start my year off right by doing everything I can do to become a better person. It’s a choice every day. May we all choose wisely.

McIntosh County Democrat

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Checotah, OK 74426
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