logo
Login Subscribe
Google Play App Store
  • News
    • Obituaries
    • Lifestyle
    • Opinion
  • Sports
  • E-edition
  • Calendar
  • Archives
  • Contact
    • Contact Us
    • Advertisers
    • Form Submission
    • About Us
    • News
      • Obituaries
      • Lifestyle
      • Opinion
    • Sports
    • E-edition
    • Calendar
    • Archives
    • Contact
      • Contact Us
      • Advertisers
      • Form Submission
      • About Us
The cost of caring too much
commentary
October 16, 2025
The cost of caring too much

Often “the cost of caring” for others and animals, especially unwanted animals can leave you physically, emotionally and financially drained.

I know too well the “cost of caring” because all my life I have constantly cared for someone or something. After the tender age of five, my grandfather got me a tiny Chihuahua puppy and told me if I wanted to keep it then I would be responsible for its care. So when it was up crying and hungry at 3 a.m. at 5-years-old I was up tending to it.

Over 50 years later I find myself in the same situation, up all night tending to newborn baby kittens every two hours and adding even more abandoned kittens, except now I have a full-time job as well. So trying to do it all can be downright exhausting. But when my family complains because I’m worn out and cranky I ask them “Who else is willing to take on this responsibility?” and suddenly the room is silent.

Caring for people and animals, especially “rescues’’ is not for the faint of heart because it can cause chronic fatigue even if you are compassionate about the cause. I have always gone out of my way to help others and animals. In fact, I currently have four rescue babies out of 15 abandoned and flea-infested kittens and a foster dog that was abandoned on the road with her pups. These poor kitties took a friend and I over six hours to bathe and de-flea and feed and feed again. Not only were they infested with fleas, but they needed to be wormed and their eyes were matted over with infections. While some people may have looked at them and turned away I personally cannot.

Over the years I’ve rubbed off on my kids as well because we all seem to have an undeniable soft spot for all of God’s creatures. And though they won’t stay up all night feeding newborns, they will help put together boxes and blankets for makeshift beds for the feral cats outside as I deal with feeding the babies round-the-clock at crazy hours.

I do this for weeks and months until I can find homes for these poor fur babies. So many weeks there are zero days off and your brain won’t switch off to rest and relax anyways. It seemed like an endless cycle which now I understand to be called “compassion fatigue.” This kind of fatigue takes you to sheer exhaustion and actually “secondary trauma” because your compassion cannot stop. Oftentimes you feel powerless because you cannot stop the suffering. You also start to feel numb and detached to everything else and emotionally disconnected. This is the real “cost of caring.”

In my lifetime I’ve rescued hundreds of animals. Some have gone to fur-ever homes and others we have brought back home after having them fixed at Happy Paws. Many have been part of the TNR (Trap-Neuter-Release) program in our neighborhood. This simple program alone helps cut down on the overpopulation of so many unwanted litters within just a few years and is being implemented in many places.

However, caring for all these animals is very costly, again physically, emotionally and financially. On almost any given day, I feed over 25 animals day and night. I empathize with Kate Paris at Happy Paws who tends to more than that at work and then goes home to tend to even more at her house. Her daughter does the same. Yet over and over again I watch people who make a lot more money than I do simply refuse to do the responsible thing and fix their pet before it becomes pregnant. This is why we want to pull our hair out people – don’t drive Cadillac and tell me that you can’t fix your cat!!! FIX YOUR DAMN ANIMALS! Quit completely exhausting everyone else and every resource we have to care for your animal. YOU BE RESPONSIBLE! YOU DO THE RIGHT THING AND TAKE CARE OF YOUR PET UNTIL IT DIES OF OLD AGE! YOU PAY THE VET BILL AND MAKE SURE YOUR ANIMAL IS WORMED, HAD ALL THEIR SHOTS, HAS ADEQUATE FOOD AND CLEAN WATER AND LIVES A HAPPY LIFE!

FOR GOODNESS SAKES – JUST BE RESPONSIBLE PEOPLE!!! YOU ARE WEARING OUT THE GOOD ONES AND WHAT WILL YOU DO WHEN THEY CAN’T DO ANYMORE? WHERE WILL YOU TURN?

Please fix ALL your pets before six months. We live in 2025 and it’s not an OOPS anymore. It’s just flat out negligence. NO EXCUSE!

The “cost of caring” is great, but the “call to care” is greater. So get off your assets and do something for a change. Care about something other than yourself and make a difference in the lives around you. This is the cost of caring too much –your bank account runs low, but your gratitude runs high when you find a few friends that hopefully their “Give A Damn” isn’t busted or wasted on irresponsible individuals who don’t really care and you find a way to do something good too and make a difference one day at a time.

Walker named District Teacher of the Year
A: Main, News...
Walker named District Teacher of the Year
By LADONNA RHODES STAFF WRITER 
October 16, 2025
Amber Walker, a 4th grade math teacher at Checotah Intermediate School (CIS), was recently named the District Teacher of the Year for Checotah Schools. From a young age, Walker knew she was destined t...
this is a test
Reed launches ‘Season of the Warrior’ Tour to honor Native American vets
A: Main, News...
Reed launches ‘Season of the Warrior’ Tour to honor Native American vets
By SHAUNA BELYEU GENERAL MANAGER 
October 16, 2025
Former Oklahoma Department of Veterans Affairs Director Pete Reed made a stop in Eufaula Oct. 2 on behalf of the Season of the Warrior campaign tour. The goal of the campaign is to reach 100 cities in...
this is a test
A: Main, News...
Teen dies from injuries caused by blowout
October 16, 2025
A juvenile from Indianola has died as the result of a tire blowout that caused a collision on the Indian Nations Turnpike at mile marker 75 in Pittsburg County on Monday, Oct. 6. According to the Okla...
this is a test
Boo to Domestic Violence
A: Main, News...
Boo to Domestic Violence
October 16, 2025
McIntosh County Democrat invites the community to say “Boo to Domestic Violence” next Thursday, Oct. 23 from 5 p.m. - 6:30 p.m. at Unique Touch, 505 N. Broadway in Checotah. Several superheroes, some ...
this is a test
BARKtoberfest, a howling-ghoul time for pups and people
A: Main, News...
BARKtoberfest, a howling-ghoul time for pups and people
By LADONNA RHODES STAFF WRITER 
October 16, 2025
Porches & Pastures hosted their 7th Annual BARKtoberfest on Saturday, Oct. 11and lots of locals and visitors had a howling-ghoul time as they listened to live music from Last Call Band and browsed thr...
this is a test
A: Main, News...
Annual turkey shoot Oct. 25
October 16, 2025
The annual Eugene Woodfork Turkey Shoot will be held Saturday, Oct. 25 from 11 a.m. to 2 p.m. on the Warrior School Grounds 10 miles west of Checotah. Turkey shoot is $4 a shot. Bring your own gun or ...
this is a test
ePaper
coogle_play
app_store
Editor Picks
A: Main, News...
Operators of daycare center accused of abuse
October 16, 2025
Jacob and Stephanie Smith, operators of a daycare center in Checotah, have been formally charged with multiple counts of child abuse. They were arrested on Oct. 1 and at their arraignment on Oct. 7 Ja...
this is a test
Checotah 4-H and FFA Booster Club
A: Main, News...
Checotah 4-H and FFA Booster Club
October 16, 2025
Monday, Oct. 20 at 6 p. m. At Checotah Agricultural Education Building Dinner will be provided.
this is a test
A: Main, News...
7th Annual Checotah Lions Club Charity Golf Tournament
October 16, 2025
Friday, Oct. 24 at Arrowhead State Golf Course – Canadian, OK Registration begins at 8 a.m. Shot Gun start at 8:30 a.m. Four Man Scramble –Cash Prizes & Door Prizes & More! Lunch immediately following...
this is a test
A: Main, News...
Heartland Heritage Museum & Checotah Art Guild 3rd Annual Pumpkin Painting Contest
October 16, 2025
For Kids Ages 3 – 11 Bring your own pumpkin or paint one of ours - first come first served - 30 painters. Sat., Oct. 25 from 10 a.m. – 12 p.m. Heartland Heritage Museum & Gallery Prizes and Ribbons Aw...
this is a test
Eternal Treasures found at Freedom House
News
Eternal Treasures found at Freedom House
By LADONNA RHODES STAFF WRITER 
October 16, 2025
The Freedom House Adult and Teen Challenge Eternal Treasures BBQ Banquet and Graduation Ceremony was held Saturday, October 4 and celebrated several ladies’ freedom from the struggles in this world. W...
this is a test
Facebook
Twitter
Tweets
Twitter
Tweets

MCINTOSH COUNTY DEMOCRAT
300-A S. Broadway
Checotah, OK
74426

(918) 473-2313

This site complies with ADA requirements

© 2023 Mcintosh Democrat

  • Contact
  • Privacy
  • Accessibility Policy